National Hug-a-tree League

[Originally posted on - and expertly copied-and-pasted from - Springing Malik]

If you've visited the homepage of nhl.com recently, you might have noticed links to the league's "NHL Green" sustainability initiative.

The limited public reaction to the initiative that I have seen appears to consist of the accusations of one or two climate-change deniers that it's all part of a global left-wing conspiracy (for the record, it's nothing to with me...)

However, the NHL community has already made an impressive number of pledges to support the initiative. Here are just a few:

• The Minnesota Wild to reduce energy use by drying players' equipment using the heat from a naked flame

• Don Cherry and Mike Milbury to continue their media campaign to limit trans-Atlantic air travel by European players

• The lifetime of red lightbulbs at Madison Square Garden to be extended by up to 200% due to policy of employing one scoring forward

• Jim Rutherford of the Carolina Hurricanes to continue his policy of repeatedly recycling players

• Fans in Vancouver to organise collection of used beer cups on the ice surface after every home playoff loss

• Fans in Montréal to flip over any car parked downtown that is not electric or a hybrid after every playoff victory
  

• Charles Wang to reduce the Islanders' carbon footprint significantly by having the team play out of a "virtual" new arena

• Joe Sakic to promote the use of shovels instead of electric or gasoline powered snow blowers
  

• The Devils, Coyotes and Panthers organisations to reduce the use of paper by printing 10,000 fewer tickets than arena capacity for each game

• The NHL to establish the "Green Trophy" to be awarded annually to the defenseman considered by voting fans to have expended the least energy in the defensive zone during the season
  

• Air conditioning in all luxury suites in the Air Canada Centre to run on the hot air produced by Brian Burke

• The scoreboard at the Pengrowth Saddledome to be powered entirely by Darryl and Brent Sutter's electric personalities

• All lighting at the new CONSOL Energy Center to be provided by the sun shining out of Sidney Crosby's lower body

• Nikolai Khabibulin to travel to work by public transport for an entire season

• Dan Carcillo to fit a draft excluder to the door of his trailer
  

• Gary Bettman and Donald Fehr to commit to a league-wide 100% reduction in air and road travel to games and arena energy usage on game nights during the 2012-13 season

• Dan Ellis to use unleaded fuel in at least half of his sportscars