Why Nabokov will clear waivers, a team by team analysis.

In order of waiver priority, here are the reasons each of these teams won’t pick Nabokov from Holland’s pocket.

Obviously Nabby’s deal with Detroit isn’t likely to hurt most salary caps, even the 12 "OTC" (over-the-cap) teams (Rangers,Wings, Wild, Sharks, Flames, Devils, Canucks, Canadiens, Kings, Flyers, Leafs, Sens, Bruins), assuming their GMs were creative enough, or they had enough season ending injuries. Still, where applicable the cap is noted. All cap information gleaned from Hockey Buzz. Note:  Players on IR and two-way players and their respective cap hits are not factored.

New Jersey               Lou said they would not. What he should have said is “could not”. And you know why? K-O-V, A-L-C, ... M-O-U-S-E.  Devils are No. 1 on the Over the Cap Race, ringing in at +8MM.

Edmonton               The Bulin Wall is costing them 3.7MM/yr and they still can’t get out of the fivehole. Goaltending is not their biggest problem. 

NY Islanders            Although they have plenty of cap space, the Islanders have a rigorous pre-signing fitness exam and rumor has it they believe Nabby would undoubtedly fail the whip cream licking test.

Ottawa                    Still stinging over the Chee Choo and Emery Buyouts and having made that deal to pay Pascale Le Claire 3MM a year. Also, no cap space since they could not unload Spezza or Alfreddson.

Toronto                  Cap space at a negative, and with Giggy being their highest paid player, they are now counting on Kessel to do it all.

Calgary                   With the third highest Cap Hit in the league(<5MM) and Kipper, there is no way in hell this would go down, unless the management were colossally stupid. Oh wait. 

Buffalo                   They Have Cap room, but they also have Hobie.

Florida                   I have nothing clever to say about the Panthers, and I refuse to stoop to cliche. They can't all be winners folks.

Columbus                Too afraid to piss Holland off, plus Steve Mason keeps promising he’s not a fluke.

Los Angeles             Just spent all their Cap room to keep their GM’s mouth shut, and to install better goal cams in Johnny Quick’s net.

San Jose                  Pride. Yea, because they have loads of that these days in SJ. (I know. Even I think this is a cheap shot, but hells bells, we all were thinking it. Just like I am thinking it would be stupid of SJ not to pick him up. Seriously. No, I mean it.)

Carolina                   Perfectly happy with Cam Ward and their middle of the pack status.  Actually Carolina could be the sleeper in this equation.  I mean, its always been rumored in the Detroit Area that Karmanos and Ilitch are mortal enemies. It would be just like Karmanos to pick up a goalie just to screw Ol’ Mike. And they have cap room.

Atlanta                    I got nothing. But who really worries about Atlanta?

St. Louis                  Provided the St. Louis Management isn’t still balled up in a corner suffering PTSD from the Wellwood and Stavos fiascoes, this could happen- just out of spite.

Minnesota                Cap issues aside, with a net-minding tandem that includes Jose Theodore, there should be no need to even speculate. 

Anaheim                  Rumor has it they wanted Nabby, but he ain’t gangsta enough and has refused to purchase a mask with a gold grill.

Chicago                   No more room on their AHL affiliate for million dollar goaltenders.

Phoenix                   Owner Bettman won’t hear of it, keeps muttering “those who defect must be punished” in strange Slavic accent of unknown origin.

Colorado                  Absolutely no reason why they shouldn’t. Except that I am holding Joe Sakic hostage and will force him to snow blow my driveway if they mess with my Wings.

NY Rangers               Two Words: Glen Sather.

Montreal                   Two more words: Carey Price. This is not commentary on Carey’s skill and success in net. Its judgment.

Nashville                   Two more words: Pekka Renne. (This is commentary on Renne’s      amazing skill)

Washington               Have reached the little known, never publicized NHL Russian quota (established in 2002) referred to in secret circles as the “R5Q" (or "There will never be another Russian 5 in this league again Quota”) and may not pick him up.

Tampa Bay                Stevie Y. would never do this to Kenny, unless he expressly let him.

Boston                      Absolutely the only team in the League without the need. Thomas-Rask tandem is amazing.

Pittsburgh                 Team moratorium on any sort of relevant NHL activity until Sid’s head gets better.

Dallas                        Still laughing about the Modano signing, B. Hull doesn’t feel the need to kick his old team when its “down”.